It's Only Just Begun

Fat, Overweight, Obese, Cow......

All words used to describe how I feel about myself :( 

I have battled my weight all my life.  I have had years where I was thin/thinner but it never stayed for very long.
Last night I signed up for weight Watchers. I don't even know why, it was a whim. Stupid. But now I am stuck with having to do it.  I paid $159 for 3 months so I will give it 3 months.
The thing is, every time I start a new diet, I fail, then I am more depressed then before, It's just a vicious circle for me. Maybe I wont fail this time, I don't know.  What I do know is I'm hungry, like ALL THE TIME, it's frustrating and annoying & it sucks.  I just want to be one of those skinny bitches I envy.  To be able to walk into a store and not go to the Plus department.  To be able to tie up my shoes or walk up a flight of stairs without struggling to breathe. To be able to sleep without choking.  Ya, that would be nice.

I started this blog to be able to talk about my feelings as I journey forward. Here goes nothing, I mean, what have I got to loose except the fat?